Wow. Just when does one’s sexuality stop evolving?

KinkseyScaleNow before you dive right in here, you should know a couple of things. Firstly this blog post may well fall into your category of “Too Much Information” and secondly, I am not a young boy any more. Even the period of being labelled a ‘youth’ is a distant memory. For I am now well into the period that is known to some as ‘adulthood’.

Throughout most of my active sexual life, I have considered myself as straight. I love having sex with women. Ok so it’s often deeply perverted, kinky, wet, messy sex, but it’s with women. I have never had any interest in being alone with and having any form of intimacy with a guy. They just don’t do anything for me. However in a previous relationship, I was introduced to the concept of ‘forced bi’, where I, was ‘forced’ (i.e. coerced) to take part in some bisexual activities. And if we’re being brazenly honest about this (TMI spoiler), that means that I was ‘encouraged’ to suck men’s cocks.

Now I don’t know whether I was good at it because I liked it, or whether I liked it because I was good at it, but it seemed that I was usually able to make a guy cum. But the bottom line is that I quite enjoyed kneeling and sucking a guy off, but only, if there was a woman there orchestrating the scenario and enjoying it.

But that was it. I had no interest in being sucked by a guy, certainly no interest at all in fucking a guy and no particular desire to be fucked by one either.

However I have noticed over the past couple of years, a very subtle shift in these desires. I still have absolutely no desire to or intention of fucking a guy. I only fuck women. I can’t see that ever changing; it’s a hard limit.

But in my sluttier moments, when with a girlfriend who has expressed a desire to see it happen, I do get turned on by the idea of my boy-cunt virginity being taken and this shift is, even now, surprising me. I’m now at the stage where although I’d be really nervous about it, if there were women there orchestrating it, holding me down, and seriously getting off on watching it, I’d be up for getting fucked by a guy. And when I say fucked, I think I mean gang-raped because I’m greedy. (If I’m sucking a guy off, then one cock is never really enough, so I don’t see how being fucked would be any different).

But then recently, things have evolved yet again. I’ve never been keen on the idea of a guy touching or wanking me. That has had no appeal. Until recently. Together with my Domme / girlfriend, we have discussed it rather frequently (and by discussed it frequently, I mean I’ve got really slutty whenever I’ve been wearing whichever silky panties she’s instructed me to wear and ended up openly getting very turned on by the prospect of trying it.

So guess what? We’re going exploring. I posted an advert on Craigslist and was rather shocked to get a lot of responses. Sure I deleted the usual type of time-waster, folk who hadn’t bothered to read it all or the big-headed types who thought that the criteria didn’t need to apply to them. But that still left a small select few.

One guy we are meeting for coffee next weekend, which I think will just be a chat to see if there’s any chemistry, but another guy we are going to see, in his very VERY posh hotel room in a couple of days. Whilst the exact format of the time there isn’t set in stone, it sounds as if I’ll be possibly blindfolded, stripped down to my underwear (either panties or silky shorts) and this guy will massage me or caress me or play or wank me or some combination of all of the above. If I get turned on and feel as slutty as I know I can get, I will almost certainly ask if I can have his cock in my mouth and Mistress is looking forward to hearing me actually asking for that. She is also looking forward to watching us both at play, him maybe wanking me until I cum and me sucking him off to completion.

Of course it might not quite work out like that, one can never predict the chemistry or the feelings of anyone in advance, but we’re having a go.

But I am still actually a bit shocked. At my age, I’m still evolving and my tastes are changing and my willingness to experiment is increasing. So given all of the above, I have no idea if I still have the right to claim to be straight. But more importantly, I don’t care. My Domme and I are happy to see where this goes. I love her with all my heart and that’ll not change. I desire and lust after her with more fervour than I ever have and that’s not going anywhere.

About severin

Nobody special and what I write might not be to everyone's taste - it tends to be a bit naughty. so you've been warned.
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6 Responses to Wow. Just when does one’s sexuality stop evolving?

  1. Good luck on your adventures! I don’t think we ever stop growing, and I think that’s one of the wonderful aspects of human life.

  2. I agree, we never stop evolving. My life has been rife with periodic epiphanies of a sexual nature. At least…I hope I never stop evolving, and you with me!

  3. becomingHIS says:

    Mmmm… I LOVE watching two men together, whether it’s just kissing, giving head or fucking. It’s so HOT!! I look forward to hearing about your Craigslist rendezvous. 🙂

  4. Claire says:

    It still surprises me how Mistress and I’s sexual tastes have changed over the years – especially as weve both gotten older. If you’d told me in my 20’s that later in life I’d be a crossdressing sub that enjoyed a good spanking, I would have had to look up half the words used, then told you that you were mental!

    We did some stuff last year on a weekend away that I *never* thought would happen, and while probably tame compared to some other folks activities, really pushed our boundaries.

    That said, Mistress loves the idea and visual of 2 guys together, and it pops up as a fantasy during play every now and then – but one of our (very few) hard rules is that we dont involve other people in our play, at all.

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